I AM THE GOD OF ALL THINGS
and I AM A BADASS!

I am The God Of Cancer
The God Of Famine
The God Of Birth Defects
The God Of Natural Disasters lulz 'natural'
The God Of Mental Illness

But The Holy Title that brings Me most Joy is The God Of Still Water

For I created Everything
All that you Touch, and Smell, Taste, Hear, and See
With the Senses I gave you

So when I Created Tiny forms of Life
That live in Still Waters
That you cannot detect with the Senses I gave you
For millennia I Enjoyed Watching You
My Playthings
Writhe in Agony from Drinking of Still Waters
Countless Lives Lost to My Tiny Creations
Especially Babies and The Infirm

Indeed I could have Warned you
With a simple Word, a simple Rule
Even with A Commandment
"Thou Shalt Boil Thy Drinking Water"
But Why Spoil MY Fun?

I Am The God of Still Water
A BADASS

And Do Not Doubt
Antonie van Leeuwenhoek Burns In Hell