Feb 25th 2011, 15:24:46
My pet peeves:
1) Asshats who know they have to turn ahead, but instead of changing lanes when they have plenty of room, they creep up beside me and turn on their signal light at the last possible minute, expecting me to hit the brakes so they can get in. There's not even anyone behind me, but I'm supposed to adjust my driving because they can't be bothered to change lanes in advance without inconveniencing another driver, and refuse to slow down to get into the totally empty CHASM behind me. You know who you are, and may the fleas of a thousand camels infest your underpants. EFFIN' CHANGE LANES IN EFFIN' ADVANCE INSTEAD OF EXPECTING THE WORLD TO REVOLVE AROUND YOU!
2) Asshats who crawl along in traffic at a snail's pace because they figure sooner or later they're gonna have to stop anyway. I DON'T CARE IF THERE'S A LIGHT UP AHEAD. KEEP UP WITH THE CAR IN FRONT OF YOU, OR 99 OTHER CARS WILL CHANGE LANES AHEAD OF YOU (AND ME), AND IT WILL TAKE US A WEEK TO GET TO EFFIN' WORK.
3) Asshats who, despite clearly seeing you are coming up quickly in the free lane, change lanes and cut you off. And then give YOU the finger. WTF??? WHEN YOU DO A LANE CHECK IN PREPARATION FOR A LANE CHANGE, TAKE NOTE OF THE SPEED OF ONCOMING CARS - NOT JUST IF THERE *IS* AN ONCOMING CAR. AND IF SAID CAR IS MOVING FASTER THAN YOU, EFFIN' WAIT FOR HIM TO PASS BEFORE YOU CHANGE LANES.
4) Asshats who gab on the phone/text/eat/do their makeup/read maps/etc. while driving. I lost a nephew to this crap, and if you are one of the ones who do it, you should be ashamed. It only takes 1 second of inattention to kill yourself (or worse, someone else). SMARTEN THE HELL UP AND PAY ATTENTION WHILE DRIVING.
Honestly - the world would be a much better place if I had a flamethrower mounted on my hood. Or better yet, a disintegration laser cannon. :p
1) Asshats who know they have to turn ahead, but instead of changing lanes when they have plenty of room, they creep up beside me and turn on their signal light at the last possible minute, expecting me to hit the brakes so they can get in. There's not even anyone behind me, but I'm supposed to adjust my driving because they can't be bothered to change lanes in advance without inconveniencing another driver, and refuse to slow down to get into the totally empty CHASM behind me. You know who you are, and may the fleas of a thousand camels infest your underpants. EFFIN' CHANGE LANES IN EFFIN' ADVANCE INSTEAD OF EXPECTING THE WORLD TO REVOLVE AROUND YOU!
2) Asshats who crawl along in traffic at a snail's pace because they figure sooner or later they're gonna have to stop anyway. I DON'T CARE IF THERE'S A LIGHT UP AHEAD. KEEP UP WITH THE CAR IN FRONT OF YOU, OR 99 OTHER CARS WILL CHANGE LANES AHEAD OF YOU (AND ME), AND IT WILL TAKE US A WEEK TO GET TO EFFIN' WORK.
3) Asshats who, despite clearly seeing you are coming up quickly in the free lane, change lanes and cut you off. And then give YOU the finger. WTF??? WHEN YOU DO A LANE CHECK IN PREPARATION FOR A LANE CHANGE, TAKE NOTE OF THE SPEED OF ONCOMING CARS - NOT JUST IF THERE *IS* AN ONCOMING CAR. AND IF SAID CAR IS MOVING FASTER THAN YOU, EFFIN' WAIT FOR HIM TO PASS BEFORE YOU CHANGE LANES.
4) Asshats who gab on the phone/text/eat/do their makeup/read maps/etc. while driving. I lost a nephew to this crap, and if you are one of the ones who do it, you should be ashamed. It only takes 1 second of inattention to kill yourself (or worse, someone else). SMARTEN THE HELL UP AND PAY ATTENTION WHILE DRIVING.
Honestly - the world would be a much better place if I had a flamethrower mounted on my hood. Or better yet, a disintegration laser cannon. :p
I cannot see your signature - so if it's witty, put it in a post instead! :p
archaic: Patty, if it was you wearing it, I'd consider a fuzzy pink pig suit to be lingerie. Patty makes pork rock.
archaic: Patty, if it was you wearing it, I'd consider a fuzzy pink pig suit to be lingerie. Patty makes pork rock.